Yes, no one else need know or be capable of knowing; the self can serve that purpose.

Now I see what you mean; cases where other do know.

Peter Montgomery wrote:
Well that is certainly how it is usually used, but a person can be ashamed of him or herself
is his or her own eyes, whether others know of it or not. I am certainly aware of things
in my own life of which I am very ashamed, even though social respect was never an issue.
That, I think is a different and more freeing kind of shame.
And thank you for your continued respectfulness.
Your presence and conduct on this list requires no apology.
----- Original Message -----
From: [log in to unmask]" href="mailto:[log in to unmask]">Marcia Karp
To: [log in to unmask]" href="mailto:[log in to unmask]">[log in to unmask]
Sent: Thursday, February 04, 2010 7:13 PM
Subject: Re: Prufrock question (Eliot interview citation)

I've understood that the nature of shame is to do with an introjected understanding of how we are or imagine ourselves to be judged or judgeable by others.

Peter Montgomery wrote:
It's not personal shame, but shame in the eyes of others as in