Yes, saying he was in love was in effect a proposal of marriage. Emily and Tom were both members of upper-class Boston families whose relatives no doubt knew each other socially and perhaps in business as well. The families would have been aware of the situation and so Tom's defection would have involved their censure. Emily had the social code of her class as reinforcement for her trust in Eliot. Diana

Nancy wrote: "As I said, there is no analogy.  In 1911, if a man said he was in love,
it was to be trusted.  That was the point of those words.  And it is
frankly disgraceful to say that when a man betrays trust the woman is
just silly.  It is outrageous.

>>> Kate Troy <[log in to unmask]> 06/14/07 8:06 PM >>>

By the way, Nancy, Annette was also a New England lady.

As I remember, Annette had a good job and received promotions, etc. She

owned a nice home. Emily waited all of those years, instead of pursuing
happiness with a man who wanted to be with her.  I imagine that Emily
used  to cry
at Christmas and Thanksgiving and on her birthday, etc., just as
Annette used
to do.

In a message dated 6/14/2007 7:40:01 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time,
[log in to unmask] writes:

Emily  Hale was a very accomplished, intelligent woman who was also a
England  lady in 1911 when she and TSE met--well before the married Viv.

When they  started writing and seeing each other, Viv had been put in
institution.  Hale did not just meet a married man and "see"  him.
is no analogy at all.  She was not remotely silly or  naive.


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