You mean it is preferable to refer to someone as "she" rather than "Diana"? How difficult is it to use a proper name instead of a pronoun? If the convention is to depersonalize members of the list, I suggest the convention be replaced by a more respectful one. It is hurtful to read a message about yourself written as if you were not there, just as it would be to overhear people talking about you in person. It is rude and hostile, IMHO. Diana


From:  Carrol Cox <[log in to unmask]>
Reply-To:  "T. S. Eliot Discussion forum." <[log in to unmask]>
To:  [log in to unmask]
Subject:  Re: Eliot and Unitarianism
Date:  Fri, 29 Sep 2006 10:45:46 -0500
Diana Manister wrote:
>
> Peter, please do not refer to me in third person when I am an active member of this list who will read your messages.

Referring to posters in the third person is more or less standard on
most lists. Using the second person tends (at least potentially) to
exclude others from the conversation. In fact, in some cases, using
"you" gives an air of positive hostility. But it doesn't seem like an
issue to get all het up about.

Carrol