The Howard Roark Prize for Achievement in Architecture
by Vivian Chu
Swiss architect Gunnar Jauch was awarded the Howard Roark Prize for Achievement in Architecture Tuesday Morning in a Ceremony held in Geneva. Mr. Jauch was given the award for his massive design of the Halliburton Oil Trade Complex and Rare Arabic Palace to be installed in New Babylon as soon as the Iraqi regime falls.
The Complex is intended by Mr. Jauch to rival the fabled Hanging Gardens of Babylon. On accepting his award, Gunnar remarked "I hope my work can forever show the glory of a truly Global Economy, pushed on by the Benign Force of American Capitalism.
Also on hand was Vice-President Dick Cheney, who was given the honor of lauding Mr. Jauch's wonderful building. In regards to the absence of President Bush, Mr. Cheney said curtly "the President can't be bothered with awards and finery now, as he has to run the war. It was also thought appropriate that I, as a former representative of Halliburton, award this prize to my pal Gunnar."
The Halliburton Oil Trade Complex and Rare Arabic Palace is based loosely on the ideas of Van Der Rohe intermingled with the work of Christopher Wren. "It's all a great conflux of straight lines, steel, and gargoyles" says Mr. Jauch. He chose this particular style, which he calls "Derwin" to celebrate the unique and folksy speech patterns of President Bush. "I'm only sad that he couldn't be here today" said Vice-President Cheney, "I know how much he likes to play Godzilla with the little architectural mock-ups."
The Roark Prize is part of an international group of awards presented by the Member Nations of the G8, known as the Ayn Rand Awards for the Promotion of Capitalism. Other well-known Recipients included Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon for the Valiant Promotion of Underpriced Labor Medal; Rupert Murdoch for the Hearst Veracity in Publishing Award; and William F. Buckley for the Ayn Rand Special Award for Impeccable Grammar.
A special airing of the Ayn Rand Awards can be seen on the Fox News Channel at 12:30 a.m. EST Wednesday, April 2.