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Didn't Bushiebaby suggest his should be the next head
to have its likeness impaled on the presidential
monument at Mt. Rushless?

P.
-----Original Message-----
From: Rickard A. Parker [mailto:[log in to unmask]]
Sent: Tuesday, October 15, 2002 2:18 PM
To: [log in to unmask]
Subject: Slightly on topic (but mainly stupid)


Yet another post in my "T.S. Eliot in the Wacky World Wide Web"
(TSE-WWWW) series (previously unamed):


http://www.google.com/search?q=cache:pQv1LOH-aXgC:www.moorishgirl.com/
Posted by the by MoorishGirl Wednesday, August 14, 2002

    Turkmenistan. All I knew about the place was that it was an ex-Soviet
    Republic and that it agreed to let George W. access its borders for
    his war on the "forces of evil." This week, though, I'm seeing the
    country and its leader in a whole new light.

    Saparmourat Niyazov , an ex-communist who was elected president after
    the fall of the USSR, was declared "President for Life" in 1999 by the
    "People's Council." Niyazov was so happy with his new gig that he went
    on a restructuring spree. To wit: He would henceforth be know as
    Turkmenbashi (meaning, Head of All Turkmen) or Turkmenbashi the
    Great. He decided that TV screens in his country would carry a golden
    silhouette of the leader at all times. He names cities, stadiums, and
    streets after himself. Next, he decreed that the months of the year
    would be renamed. January would be named after him: Turkmenbashi.
    Other months would be named after his political oeuvre, Turkmen poets,
    or national leaders. In a tell-tale sign, though, he decided that
    April would be named "Mother" in deference to his own mother, who died
    when he was young. T.S. Eliot said April is the cruelest month, and
    seeing how Niyazov turned out, maybe he was right. Finally, he decided
    to rename the stages of life. Adolescence lasts until the age of 25,
    and old age doesn't kick in until age 85. Since I find that I am now
    in my "youth" period, I think I like his definitions better. Can you
    imagine conversations in Turkmenistan these days?

    "Excuse me. Can you tell me the way to Turkmenbashi?"
    "Why, just take Turkmenbashi down to Turkmenbashi!"

    Or:
    "Your little Turkmenbashi grows taller every day."
    "Yes, he will turn 5 next Turkmenbashi."

    Or:
    "Do you Turkmenbashi?"
    "Course I do, every day!"

    I wonder what changes I would implement if I were a potentate...